Black Tie Two
by Penguinperson23
Summary: Prince Gerhardt Hapsburg didn't actually die; it was a cover up, and now it's exactly 365 days after his 25th birthday. Jack invites Liz to his 26th birthday party. She accepts on the terms that Jack does her any one favor. Jenna has problems with a Locks of Love representative and Tracy goes Dr.Spaceman's office. Kenneth and Pete appear too. Happy Birthday Prince!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Invitation

"Lemon!" Jack exclaimed. "There you are! I didn't see you this morning, and I need to ask you something."

Liz, knowing the only time Jack came to her office was for advice or because he needed something, said "I was late because I fell asleep while eating salad last night and I had to wash out the lettuce and dressing this morning."

Jack stared at her with a pitiful glance before saying, "I never needed to know that Lemon."

"Anyway Jack", she said while rolling her eyes, "What did you come down here for?"

"Well", he gulped, "I know considering last year's incident, you might say no, but I was wondering if you would accompany me to Prince Gerhardt Habsburg's 26th birthday party."

Liz suddenly snapped out of her tired daze. "What? Ummm, errr, I thought the Prince died at last year's party…"

She thought back to last year_. Bianca, Jack's ex-wife, had been there with another man. Jack had then stopped having a good time and got all depressed. Liz had hatched a plan where her and Jack pretended they were dating. She did this because she wanted to cheer Jack up by showing him how jealous Bianca was. Liz had run up to Bianca and exclaimed, "Jack just proposed to me!" Then, all heck broke loose, and Bianca had gone all psycho-bitch on her. Bianca tore her dress off and ripped a patch of her hair out. Liz was glad she did it, though, because Jack __**had**__ invited her to the "social event of the year" and he also had been happy upon seeing Bianca's jealous rage._ Her thoughts then trailed to the awkward moment that night, back at her apartment, but she was interrupted.

Jack chuckled. "No, that actually turned out to be a cover-up because of-"

"Say-no-more Jack, it's already a no," Liz snapped.

"I was prepared for you to say that, just as I was prepared for Former President Bush's Reign of America to end."

Liz rolled her eyes again. _Boy, I do that a lot, she thought_. "A president can only serve up to eight years, Jack."

"I was in the Conservative Corporate Cult to try and make him supreme ruler of the world, but things didn't exactly work out," Jack announced while fixing his sleek red and blue tie.

Liz looked at him with a doubtful flash. _Of course he was in the Conservative Corporate Cult, she thought sarcastically, I should've known. _"Huh…anyway, I have to get back to work Jack, and I'm sorry but I don't want to have another encounter with your crazy ex-wife."

Jack suddenly panicked and quickly ran his fingers through his thick, jet-black hair. He knew she would say no. _Calm down Donaghy, he thought, it's just Lemon you're talking to. You've made snide remarks in front of the Six Sigmas for crying out loud, you can do this- no problem._ "Lemon, wait," Jack said coolly, "If you come with me, I will do ANY one favor for you."

Liz blinked. "Any favor?"

Jack leaned down and put both hands on her desk. "You have my word," he responded deeply, looking straight in her eyes.

Liz blushed. _Ugh, stop it, she thought._ She stood up and pondered the offer but she knew she couldn't let her best friend down. "…Fine! I'll go to the stupid party again! Ugh, I don't know how you pull me into these things, but I guess one favor from Jack Donaghy is too much to pass up," she grumbled.

Jack jumped up. "Yes! I knew you would, thank you Lemon, and you know in the case that Bianca shows up again, you'll need to-"

"Pose as your wife, I know Jack, you are going to regret this deal, because when I think of the ultimate favor, you will wish you never asked me to go to the Prince's birthday!"

Jack had already had walked to her office door. "I'm already beginning to regret it…" he lightly laughed.

Liz sat down and returned to her previous thoughts. _That night, one year ago today, he had gone up to her apartment to thank her for a fun night. They were talking and laughing about it, but then, suddenly, he had leaned down and put his hands around her neck. She thought he was going to kiss her, so she had stuttered, "I-I don't know if this is a good idea Jack". But, of course, he had just been leaning down to take the diamond necklace he had let her borrow off of her neck. She had felt so humiliated and stupid after that. He had lightened the mood, joking about all the "dinners" he had had with a bunch of celebrities. It had helped, but Liz knew she had dropped an a-bomb (awkward bomb). That's mostly why she had been so reluctant to accept Jack's offer. She didn't want to make it awkward between them. He was her best friend. She didn't want to ruin it; she had seen that happen to her too many times._

Again, her thoughts were interrupted, but this time it was by a knock on her office door.

"Come in," she said.

Jenna burst into the room. "Liz", she blurted, I'm having a problem!"

Liz sighed, of course Jenna was having a problem; she did practically every day. Liz supposed she really didn't mind hearing what she had to say today, though, because this would distract her from her thoughts about the party.

Liz let out a concerned face. "What is it Jenna?"

Jenna cleared her throat. "Well, on Saturday I decided not to go and donate my gorgeous blonde hair to the Locks of Love, and now their representatives are after me because I was kind of the main attraction at the event. What should I do?"

"Jenna, why didn't you just donate in the first pla-"

"My blonde beauties are what make me so irresistible to men; I couldn't just part with them," Jenna interrupted.

Liz wanted to laugh at Jenna's statement, but held it back. "Well Jenna, I guess I could call and say you needed them for all the skits on the show, and that you couldn't cut it because of that," Liz said.

"THANK YOU LIZ!" Jenna screamed. She ran over to Liz and hugged her.

"Now that all _my_ important stuff is cleared up, what's up with you Liz?"

"Well, Jack invited me to Prince Geirhart's 26th birthday party," Liz said in an annoyed tone.

"He invited you on another date? He must really like you Liz," Jenna said.

Liz fumed, got out of her chair, and straightened her blue blazer. "It's not a date Jenna! I'm doing it as a favor in return for a favor."

"Well, think whatever you want Liz, but I say it's a date," Jenna teased.

Liz glared at her friend, but feared she was right. Hopefully it would be just like last year, but without the awkward moment at the end.

As if Jenna could read what Liz was thinking, she laughed and said, "It's a date Liz, get over it. I promise I won't say anything to anyone. I have gone on dates with attractive older men too. Don't worry; unless it ends up like the date I went on with Morgan Freeman, then you might end up in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. You can trust me!" Jenna then opened the door.

Liz was furious at her friend because she was probably right about the whole situation. "It's not a date Jenna….we're just really good friends!" She screeched as Jenna walked out of the room.

It wasn't a date, right? RIGHT?


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: CDD

Tracy walked into Dr. Spaceman's office and threw himself into the waiting chair outside the office. Dot Com had driven him there on the account that he had accidently poured booze, instead of milk, with his cereal. He wasn't drunk though; it took a lot more than that to get Tracy Jordan, Star of TGS, drunk. His thoughts strayed; _he hated these monthly check-ups; he would much rather be doing something else. Like eating. Or getting a foot massage. Or being at a strip club. Better yet, eating while a stripper gave him a foot massage._ His happy thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the doctor.

"Tracy," Dr. Spaceman said nonchalantly, "It's your turn to see me. Sorry I made you wait; I was helping a co-worker release the sexual tension between us." He laughed loudly. He then proceeded to tuck his shirt in. Tracy gave the doctor a funny look and stepped into his office. "Anyway, Tracy, from the tests we received, it looks like you have something called "CDD".

"What's that?" Tracy said inquisitively.

"Basically, you have Celebrity Deficiency Disorder, and you suffer from becoming distracted by everything. You can't focus for too long, and become bored of things within seconds."

Tracy had stopped listening to the doctor. A flash of fur had caught his eye in the window; it was a chipmunk. He hadn't paid attention to the rodent for more than five seconds, though, chipmunks were boring to watch.

Tracy's attention shifted back, and without knowing a word the doctor said, he asked, "What's the treatment?"

"Well, you _could_ go through the extensive mumbo-jumbo therapy they have these days that will fix your problem forever, or you could just take these red pills that have unknown and possibly dangerous side effects."

"Well…hmmm…" Tracy pondered.

The doctor happily chimed in, "They taste like cherry!"

"Okay," Tracy jumped, "I'll have a bottle of the red ones!"

Tracy picked up the bottle, rushed out the door and yelled "Thanks Doc!"

Jack stood in front of his thinking window. It was his and his only to think in. Once, he had even made Lemon move to the window next to it because she was thinking in _his_ spot. He was there because he was recalling the events that had happened at last year's birthday extravaganza. _Well, of course Bianca had been there. He had still loved her then. He had been depressed to see her with another man, though Lemon had distracted and cheered him up. Just seeing the jealous look on her face after he had "proposed" to Lemon had made him over-satisfied. This year, he mused, he almost wanted to see Bianca there so she could see that Lemon and him were still "together". He didn't want Bianca to be jealous anymore, he just wanted to let her know that he was happy with someone else. Wait; did he just say "happy with someone else"? That someone else was Lemon! Good God!_ He shook his head. _No, that couldn't have been what he just pieced together. _His thoughts wandered;_ he didn't want to have just pieced that together. Lemon was his best friend. Though he probably wouldn't mind dating her, he also didn't want to ruin what was between them. He could always confide in her, no matter what. Most of the people he actually dated were usually short, casual relationships. He didn't want Lemon to fall into that category. Though, he __**had**__ kind of just forced her to go on a date with him._ "Damnit Donaghy," he cursed aloud. _Then again, he thought, maybe it was just a mentor showing his mentee how to have a good time. Mentors had to help to guide their mentees in every subject of life, right?_ He pondered. _If this was him showing her how to have a good time, then it would be the best time Elizabeth Lemon ever had._

Jenna sat in her wardrobe. _I look so beautiful today, she thought_. _What would the show do without me?_ She primped her hair and sighed. Today was going pretty slow. She had not gotten any creeper mail, and no one had asked for her autograph yet. She loved when she got creeper mail; it meant she was so famous and loved that someone was devoted enough to track her every move. She adored devoted fans, though Liz had warned against going near the die-hard ones. _Speaking of devoted fans, she thought,_ _what if Liz forgets to call the Locks of Love Representative?_ _There would be a good chance of this because of the date she was going on._ She panicked. She did not want those crazed representatives chasing after her. She sprang out of her chair. "I must tell Kenneth!"

Kenneth was sitting at his page desk, picking out the peas from Tracy's fried rice. He knew it was the way Mr. Jordan liked it. He loved doing things for him, weather it was being a human guinea pig for all of his medications, or giving him a back massage, Kenneth _loved_ working for Mr. Jordan. "That's the last one", Kenneth cheerfully said as he threw the last pea in the garbage. "Here you are Mr. Jordan!"

"Thanks K-Dog!" Tracy said as he took a huge mouthful. "You made just the way I like it!"

"I do know all of your favorite foods sir," Kenneth said cheerfully.

Just as suddenly as Tracy left his desk, Jenna appeared at it. And she did not look happy.

"What's wrong Ms. Maroney?" Kenneth asked.

"Kenneth. If a Locks of Love representative shows up, you must distract them until I can escape."

"I'm not sure how I would distra-"

"You will do it," Jenna stated.

Kenneth scratched his head and asked, "Why do you need to escape from them?"

"Don't ask, just do it please," Jenna said.

Unsarcastically, Kenneth cheered, "Well…okay Ms. Maroney! Whatever you say!"

"Also," Jenna added, "go to wardrobe and tell them to pull that red dress Liz wore to the Prince's party last year. Jack won't be able to resist her in it."

"Where I came from," Kenneth stated, "people aren't allowed to wear the color red-that's the color of the devil."

Jenna rolled her eyes. _Silly Kenneth and his strange beliefs…._

"Just do it please."

"Okay Ms. Maroney…" Kenneth hurried away to do what the other star of TGS had told him to do. He wasn't just Mr. Jordan's servant; he was also Ms. Maroney's!

Suddenly, Liz, who had overheard the last part of the conversation while hiding around the corner, popped out from around the wall and blurted, "Wait! Jenna, why, no!"

"Don't worry Liz," her friend smiled, "I'm just trying to help your fashion situation for tonight…..don't worry about it!"

Liz threw her hands into the air. "Thank you for being concerned about me Jenna, but I think I can handle it."

"No you can't Liz. No offense, but your choice of outfits are usually horrible. Besides it's the same dress as you wore last year."

Liz rolled her eyes. She didn't have any more time to argue with Jenna because she had to shoot some promos for the show before the day was over. _Oh boy, she thought, I just let Jenna pick my outfit. _

**I hope you all liked Chapter 2! This chapter took more thinking than chapter 1 because I had to come up with a way to incorporate more characters into the story. Chapter 3 will have interaction between Liz and Jack and also include Pete, Toofer, Lutz, and Frank! Thank you all for reading and comments are very much appreciated! I love when I get constructive criticism **


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Cookies, Pranks, and Floor 52

"What are you doing here Cookie Monster? I thought you got diabetes and had to go to the hospital. Why are you sitting in my dressing room?" Tracy had taken the new medication to treat his CDD with the delicious meal Ken had prepared him. The cookie monster was now talking to him.

"...Mmmmm, do you have cookie Tracy?" The cookie monster asked.

"Now that you say it Cookie Monster, go get ME a cookie! I'm hungry!"

"No! C is for Cookie and Cookie Monster wants cookie NOW!"

Tracy shouted, "THIS IS MY HALLUCINATION. I AM IN CONTROL! Now, go get me a cookie or I will have to tell Liz Lemon to get rid of you!"

The Cookie Monster looked afraid…very afraid. He ran out of the room, in search of a cookie.

Tracy snorted and yelled, "You better run boy!"

* * *

Frank, Toofer, and Lutz were sitting in their usual chairs right outside of Liz's office. And, as usual, they had no good ideas for sketches this week.

"Hey Lutz," Frank asked, "Do you and Toofer wanna pull a prank on Pete with me? I have no ideas for sketches right now, and I feel like doing something demoralizing for society."

Lutz and Toofer's eyes lit up. They all huddled in a circle around the snack fridge, planning the perfect prank.

* * *

Two bald, suspiciously well-dressed men burst into Jenna's heavily perfumed dressing room.

"She's not here", one remarked.

The other man looked around the room. "Damn. I thought we would surely nab her in here."

"We'll have to ask around then…how about that scrumptious little page we saw when we got here. Maybe he'll…tell us something."

The other man nodded in silence, and they both walked towards the page desk.

Kenneth looked up from his duties. "Oh! Hello there fellas! I didn't see you come in."

"Hello…Kenneth," one of the men said as he peered at Kenneth's name tag. "Me and my…associate are looking for Jenna Maroney. Do you know where we could find her?"

Kenneth was not the suspicious type, but Jenna _had_ told him to look out for bald men. "May I ask why you are looking for her gentlemen?"

"We are from the Locks of Love. We need to talk to her about a…missed opportunity.

_Oh no, Kenneth thought, I must distract them. Ms. Maroney's beautiful hair could be at risk__**!**_

"Well", Kenneth stammered, "Sh-she's not here right now, so while you're waiting, why don't you take a tour of the studio with me!"

The two men looked at each other. They could by-pass this obviously lying page. Or, they could go on a tour with this adorable little muffin.

"Let's do it", the men said in more of a creepy way than Kenneth would have liked. _Oh well, Kenneth thought. At least Ms. Maroney was okay. _

"Right this way fellas!

* * *

Liz was leaning on the walls in the elevator. She was heading to floor 52. Again. She was visiting Jack's office. Again. She was angry. Angry not at Jack, but about _her_ feelings towards him. She loved Jack. Loved him as a friend, that was for certain. But, he seemed more than just a 'friend'. Pete was her friend, but she felt a lot differently about him. She loved all of her friends a certain way, but her love for Jack was different. He was her mentor, always looking out for her and being unconditionally devoted to her. She could talk to him about anything, and afterwards, she always felt better and knew how to find a solution. But, romantically? She had no idea how she felt and floor 52 had caught up with her thinking.

She walked out of the elevator. _Well, I guess I'll just ask him if it's a date again…_

* * *

…_And she'll just laugh and tell me the notion is ridiculous_, he thought.

His office door swung open. Their eyes met simultaneously.

She stammered…

He stammered…

"Is this a date?"

Awkward silence filled the room for a few, brief agonizing seconds, and then Jack opened his mouth.

"Well…Lemon, I, uh, just wanted to see if a six-o'clock pickup at your place would be okay?" He smoothed his suit jacket and walked over to her.

"Sure, uh, that's perfect I, um, guess."

"Good. Lemon, I just want to say thank you for accompanying me again. I'm sure tonight will be fun and eventful, as things always seem to be with you."

_Jack always knew how to lighten an awkward conversation,_ she thought. "Maybe this time", she chuckled, "I'll keep all my hair."

* * *

**Well, IT HAS BEEN A LONG TIME! I**'**m really sorry to everyone, but school makes it so I have no time for writing. I hope you like Chapter 3! Hopefully, I can get Chapter 4 up before my break ends. As always, I love comments on how to get better J**


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